Parenting, while being an enjoyable experience can also be one of the toughest and the most tedious tasks in one’s life. Nothing remains the same once you are a parent. From handling your little one’s infancy, to childhood, to teenage and adulthood, the responsibilities are humongous.
Single motherhood comes with a plethora of emotional and physical challenges. A single mother is constantly striving to make ends meet between her work, child, family, and friends. Among the many challenges that single mums face, the most prominent ones include – Zero to reduced social life, lack of personal space, loneliness, stress, decision-making difficulties, financial problems (often if not always), and a constant fear of not being enough or doing enough for the child.
However, if you are a single mom who is trying to manage it all, there are several ways you could keep up with the demands of parenting and yet stay sane through it all. Here are some effective tips to help bring up your child in a more organized and sorted manner. These tips will help you stay in charge of the situation, bond better with your little one, and even find some much needed ‘me-time’. Read on to find out how:
Working long hours and spending very little time at home can take away the much-needed personal time with the child. Find a job which is close to your child’s school or to your home or vice versa so that you can always reach to your child in time. Never hesitate to reveal your single motherhood. This will enable you to choose a job that suits your needs.
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Whether it is spending time at home, going for a stroll to the park, shopping or hanging around with friends, make sure your dedicated time with your child is not compromised for any reason. Complete all your work-related tasks at your workplace and never carry them home. If you work from home, follow a time table. This will ensure you focus on your child’s education, progress, and personal development.
Losing temper can be common for single mothers due to the very nature of raising a child alone. It is very important to stay calm in difficult situations as yelling will only put you in regrettable situations later. Constant bickering can affect your child’s behaviour.
It is not always possible to be right, be on time or control people around you. Hence, letting go or laughing it off will make you feel better and keep you calm during tough situations.
As a single parent, it is important you talk to your children about your ex-partner and keep them informed about their father. However, it is your responsibility to create a good image about him as maintaining a positive image will enhance positivity in your child’s mind. The lessons you preach are what your child will practice. Avoid arguments or conflicts with your ex in front of your child.
Finances can be the hardest aspects of single parenthood. Whether it is freelancing or having your own business, it is always safe to plan your finances well so that you are financially secure. Having a budget for important, unavoidable expenses like rent, electricity bills, investments, education, medical, etc. can be a sensible way to plan your expenses.
Never feel sorry for being a single parent as the success of the child always depends on the values he/she is brought up with. Children consider their parents as their role models very early in life and aspire to be like them.
Portray a strong image of yourself as this goes a long way in laying the foundation for the child growing up to be a good human. Actions like practicing patience, handling difficult situations smartly, practicing discipline, teaching good values, etc. significantly contribute to the child’s development.
There will be days when you might want to seek help, like a sudden emergency at work or outside at any time of the day. Never hesitate to ask for help or turn down any help offered by close friends/relatives as it is only a gesture and not a favour. Your child is more important than your ego. Moreover, this practice also teaches your child that it is always fine to seek help when needed. Have reliable emergency contacts to call for help like a relative, a friend, a babysitter, a driver, a cleaner etc. as it will take some stress off your mind.
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Children need to be treated as children and not like adults. Since single parents have their child as their only companion most of the times, they tend to include them in everything they do. Interacting with the child about financial problems, engaging them in adult conversations, using inappropriate language etc. will have a negative impact on the child’s mind.
Amidst the responsibilities of being a single mother, do not forget that it is equally important that you take care of your own health and make sure to meet your friends and hang out regularly. Only when you are happy, you can make a happy family. Borrowing a reliable and trustworthy, helping hand to take care of your child until you return is important. Taking time off your monotonous routine will make you feel alive and refreshed from the stress.