We often tend to compare ourselves with our moms and our grandmothers when it comes to raising children. They did a fabulous job with such limited resources while we “modern” moms sometimes find it so hard to understand what our child needs. Check out the differences between moms now versus moms 50 years ago.
This got me thinking about moms then vs. moms now. The deal with our moms was quite simple. They listened to their mothers and just trusted that they knew better. But, with mommies today there are so many articles surfacing the internet about good and bad parenting that they often challenge the methods used back then. It creates a lot of confusion about which parenting method to follow.
Our mothers never thought twice about raising a hand to us. Today, when I read about the damage it does to the child’s confidence, it scares me to be the one doing that to my child. Yet, I also know that I am a confident and happy woman despite the punishments. So that does leave me confused sometimes. Nevertheless, I follow gentle parenting and have decided never to hit my child.
Moms 50 years ago worked purely out of instinct. They did not have a search engine, or social media or mom groups to discuss all the problems related to their child. Mommies then were a lot calmer than us today. If today my child runs a slight fever, I am scared and immediately start googling the symptoms and rushing to the doctor. My grandmother tells me, a wet cloth on the forehead will do! But, I cannot accept that and confess that I really trouble the pediatrician with several questions just to be sure.
Moms 50 years ago let their kids learn from their mistakes. Falling and getting hurt was a part of the toughening and growing up process. But, moms today are not happy until the home is completely baby-proofed when their child arrives. Yes, my mother laughed at me – but, in my defense, my home has a lot more sharp ends and harmful objects.
Schooling was also very different back then. The teacher knew best – and the parents too believed that. But today when I read about children collapsing on playgrounds because of severe punishments and the horrific incidents in schools, the trust I can put in a teacher is very limited. Also, with emerging research suggesting that our school system stifles creativity and individual thought. Since every child learns at his own pace and in his own way – it makes me wonder if our school system and curriculum need to change.
Today’s mommies are more hands on. Despite given the number of working moms today, parents try to take out quality time to play with their kids. Some mommies I know play a lot of board games, read stories and make their kids do a lot of fun activities. But, I don’t think any of our moms or grandmoms did all that. They were focused on giving us good nutritious food and a big cuddle whenever we needed one. There was never any dedicated bonding time as such, but that too never let us feel neglected!
It is true that one has to change with times. But the question is how much? Moms back then have so many important parenting lessons to teach us that we must lend our ear to them. But, moms today also need to protect their little ones in the best way they think possible. The only thing right is to strike a balance and give the kids a good mix of old and new. Do you agree with this list of differences between moms now versus moms 50 years ago.
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